Old Wine and Young Men

We are taught to allow time to let a great Cabernet age, but should we do the same with men? There are guidelines written and intensive studies taken advising consumers what the optimal date will be to uncork each individual bottle of wine. Following these directions ensures that your bottle will be full-flavored and at the peak of conditioning. So where is the book that advises a lady of the best time to date a particular man? Each vintage and every bottle of wine is unique and different as every man. Should we decant a guy as we do our wine...open him up and then give him some air to develop?


One day I was at work, busily creating something French and delicious in the kitchen when a figure caught my eye. Outside the window was an amazingly beautiful man. Straight off the CW network...well, when a CW show flashes forward ten years to show the character as an adult. Blonde hair blowing in the texas breeze. It was a hot summer day and the sun glistened off of his chisled gold chest. His eyes were blue, as the sky contrasts the grey clouds.


I made many excuses to go out side and sneak a peak. This guy was so out of my league. I wasn't even in the stands watching him play, I was peaking through the gaps in the bleachers. When you pour a glass of wine, any experienced wine taster will lead you through the journey with all of your senses. Swirl the glass slowly, appreciating the legs as they run down into the wine. I spent some time checking out how his legs ran, and appreciated every minute of it. Deeply inhale the the aromas as they emerge, enjoying the "nose" of the wine. I couldn't help but wonder....


After work I gathered my stuff and got ready to go. Drunk off of lust, I made my way out the door, and was pleasantly surprised when he met me at my car. I could barely keep myself from smiling at everything he said, so I just grinned at him like an idiot! He was too damn beautiful!! He asked me why I was laughing and I made up some excuse about how he reminded me of something...yeah, the man of my dreams!!! I mean this guy is romance novel hot. Think the pirate and the peasant, which you can find in the literary section of your local pharmacy near the boxed wine. When he asked me for my number, I almost lost it. I was floored!!! So happy. How could he, ask me?

Later that night we exchanged text messages, and the subject of age arose. Some worry-free gloating, some chiding remarks, and he responded.

"I'm twenty."

HAAAAAAAA??? Yeah right! This guy looked like he had a few years on me, but in a good way. The riper the berry, the sweeter the juice. Well, the berry was still green! I couldn't pick it!

Then he asked the dreaded question of my age. I responded that I was 25. He replied, "Well that's good, maybe you could buy beer for me sometime, lol". Really? Is that the new pick up line?? This is not the kind of shoulder tap that I was looking for. I felt terrible, and officially had my first "I'm old" moment.

I stopped talking to him. I was embarassed that even though it's a legal match now, two years ago it wouldn't have been.


Had I continued on with this young man, I might have had a good time. Maybe we could go to a kegger at his big brother's house. Maybe I could buy us some beer and we could go to a park and drink it. Meet some friends in the Safeway parking lot one Friday night? The fact is, he wouldn't have been ready to give what I was asking for. I almost opened a Cabernet that needed more time. With time I am sure he is going to age like a Silver Oak Cabernet, but his bottle wouldn't suit the taste of a true connoisseur. Wine improves with age. The older I get, the better I like it.




Filet Mignon with Red Wine Reduction Sauce:
Ingredients

• 6 (4 to 6-ounce) filet mignons
• Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
• 3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
• 6 tablespoons cold unsalted butter
• 1 onion, thinly sliced
• 1 tablespoon minced garlic
• 1 teaspoon dried oregano
• 1/4 cup tomato paste
• 2 1/2 cups dry red wine

Directions

Preheat grill to medium-high heat.

Generously season the steaks with salt and pepper and drizzle with the 3 tablespoons of olive oil. Grill to desired doneness, about 5 minutes per side for medium-rare. Transfer the steaks to a cutting board. Tent with foil and let stand 10 minutes.

Meanwhile, melt 2 tablespoons of butter in a heavy large saucepan over medium-high heat. Add the onions and saute until tender, about 5 minutes. Season with salt. Add the garlic and oregano and saute until fragrant, about 30 seconds. Stir in the tomato paste and cook for 2 minutes, stirring constantly. Whisk in the wine. Simmer until the sauce reduces by half, stirring occasionally, about 10 minutes. Remove the skillet from the heat. Strain the sauce into a small bowl, pressing on the solids to extract as much liquid as possible. Discard the solids in the strainer and return the sauce to the saucepan and bring back to a slow simmer. Cut the remaining 4 tablespoons of butter into small 1/2-inch chunks and whisk in the sauce a little at a time. Season the sauce, to taste, with salt and pepper.

Place filets on each of 6 dinner plates. Drizzle the sauce over the filets and serve.

Mystery Meat

A Four Course Guide to the Blind Date

At some point in the journey through Singledom, a friend is bound to suggest another friend that might be a good match. You hear about how great they are, and that they are just like you, and that they also shares a love of cooking and hiking and watching movies on cold blustery days. So you agree to go out with them; why not, you don't have a packed social agenda (this week).

Appetizer course: The Phone Call

This call is your appetizer to the full meal of your blind date. The appetizer sets the tone for the rest of your dining experience, predicting how you’ll feel as you feed your way through each course. This first phone call carries the same weight, so you want to place your order carefully. Bruschetta can burst with the flavor of sun-ripened tomatoes and crisp basil, delighting your senses to crave more. However, it could be soggy, and stale with regret. You have two bites maximum to make a stellar impression, so try not to make a mess. Mix together a perfect measure of fun, a dash of depth, and a witty sprinkle of salt to bring out your flavor. The phone call should be short and sweet, making a connection without ruining your appetite. The conversation should leave you hungry and excited for the second course.

Soup or Salad course: The Pre-Date
I’m a big fan of the Pre-Date; that brief meeting over coffee, or ice cream, maybe a cold beer to decide if there is enough fodder to move toward a full dinner-length date. It’s like the soup or salad option that accompanies many restaurant entrees: not everyone adds it, but those who do really appreciate that it arrives before the meal. If you like the soup, savor the flavors as they interact over your tastebuds – is there enough spice to your conversation, or is it unbearably bland? How’s the temperature – hot and steamy, or cold and awkward? For those diet-conscious readers that prefer to order the salad, evaluate what’s on your plate. Were you served a generous mixture of crunchy fresh veggies that stimulate your belly and your brain, or did a plain plate of iceberg lettuce land in your lap? Was dressing slopped all over the plate, drowning you in its overpowering acidity? Or was the dressing served neatly on the side to add to your own taste, contributing and complimenting your plate? It’s important that your pre-date doesn’t overload you so much that you don’t have any interest in the next course, but that your hunger is satiated until your entrée arrives. If it’s bad, pay your tab and pass on the next time. If you enjoy yourself, order the next course and plan on a full meal.

Entrée course: Your First Date
The main entrée is the true test of a meal, the point that leads the taster to return again for seconds or to leave a half-eaten plate for waste. Your Blind Date has made it through the screening process and isn’t so blind anymore. Over a candlelit table for two, you can clearly see each other in all your glory. A perfect entrée is balanced and filling, but leaves a little room for the sweet taste of success after the meal. The plate should be colorful and carefully arranged to impress the person just enough for him to want make a mess of it. Just like the variance in your meal, your conversation should include an array of interests. Talking only about yourself, or only about him, will leave you unfulfilled and craving that certain something to make your meal complete. Undoubtedly your eyes will start wandering to other patrons' plates...wondering why you didn't order THAT instead...you develop a serious case of dish envy. So order up what you like, and be honest with yourself about if it satisfies your heart's cravings. Like a restaurant recommendation, your friends think that you'll really like this guy; but in the end you are left to decide if the meal meets your expectations or not.

Dessert Course: The Follow Up Call
It's time to decide if you want dessert. There are a lot of choices on the menu....from custard and mousse to pie and cake. Do you stick with your friend's recommendation and follow up with your dinner date? Do you venture back out to the menu and choose something sweet by yourself this time? If you got your fill on that first date and aren't interested in taking it further, then don't order dessert. If you liked the meal and need something sweet to top it off, take the lead and call him to set up the next encounter. The follow up call should be like the perfect end to a meal. Sweet, full of taste, and not too heavy. Wait long enough that your entree's digested, so neither of you will be too full and consequently very uncomfortable. No gushing, no lingering over the last drops of creme fraiche. Remember, you aren't committing to eating the same thing every night, you just think that you like the diner and hope that it's open the next time you want to go out to dinner!

Last Call

There are many reasons to not date a bartender. You meet him on the job, and can't be sure if he's charmed by you or if he is just into your generous tipping. Most often, it's the money speaking and not his heartfelt desires. Give any girl a few drinks and it probably won't matter what he's really doing, the ego boost is enough to carry through the night.

Bartenders are an unusual cocktail of intrigue: mix one part flirtation with one-part charm, add a splash of reservation and a top it with a twist of disinterest; shake well and strain into a good-looking martini glass. Our specialty drink tonight, ladies, is an Emotionally Distant Social Magnet. Bartenders pump up our self esteem, but is there more to it than just a wink and a tip? Is it their job to refill both our drinks and self confidence? Or is it their drive to just shake it up? Most importantly, how do you know when you've finally had too much and it's time to close out the tab?

When I walked into the bar that first night, I was drawn to his infectious smile and beautiful big green eyes. He was wearing a green baseball cap that covered up is radiant red hair. Before him, my only experiences with Red Headed Sluts were out of a shot glass, with one eye closed. My friend and I sat at the bar and talked with him casually throughout the evening. I should have guessed how it would turn out when he asked if I "work in the industry" meaning do I keep the same crazy hours that he is inclined to work. The lights came on and lit his head aflame; he leaned over and asked for my number. That last round either puts you right at the edge, or tumbling over it; I warily stepped up and gave him my number, thinking I had actually met an individual who has goals and aspirations.

We went out for drinks, and he selected our bibations with the panache of a gourmet chef meticulously planning a four-course meal. He told me about his dream to attend medical school, and then listened attentively as I explained my profession. After a nice night full of fruity shots and good beer, we called it a night.

A couple weeks had passed, and keeping up with his schedule was taking its toll. I would meet him after he got off work for some late night breakfast, but that was about it. He worked late and slept all day, as anyone would. One night we went to Denny's for a late night meal. Walking into the not-so-romantic diner setting, I looked over at him to find a peculiar look on his face. He started acting really weird, frequently glancing over at a table occupied by a blonde girl and an older, creepy looking biker guy. Finally I asked him what was wrong, and learned it was his ex girlfriend. Ex? What? Like a warm shot of whiskey, the news didn't sit too well in my stomach. I asked him if he wanted to go, and he said YES. We ended up heading to a different restaurant.

For the remainder of the evening he would not shut up about it. It was like the lingering taste of fake apple flavoring when you've already downed your last Appletini for the night. The taste adds false flavor to everything else you put in your mouth. I was exhausted by this endless, one-sided conversation. It was ridiculous, and I actually said at one point, "Let's just stop talking about it". Very few situations are as lame as listening to a guy that you are dating talk about his ex over breakfast at 3 in the morning!!!! And note: If you want to convince me that you are over your ex, don't drench my pancakes with your syrupy tale of regret. He was clearly still shaken up about it, and I decided to not hold it against him.

After that the calls stopped. I wasn't even offended, because I stopped calling him too. I breifly wondered if it was his Ex? Did they get back together? Did I care? Once you make a decision to do something you need to commit to it, especially if you decide to start dating someone else. There is a barside school of thought that will help any drinker decide if they should order one more drink or call it a night: GO BIG OR GO HOME. It applies evenly to breakups too, with a minor alteration: GO BIG OR STAY HOME. Otherwise you end up running into the ex at Denny's and acting like a complete loon.

In the end, when the lights go up and you are searching for your mysteriously missing phone, don't take him up on that number. You will see him again next time, and maybe leaving it at a casual encounter will net you a few free beers. If you give in easily only to find that it doesn't work out, you will be left with no choice but to black list that drinking hole. And most likely the experience will leave you with that nasty "I just took a disgusting shot" face. The taste of regret is terrible, and is the prominent flavor in a glass of Emotionally Detached Social Magnet. So take notice when you've already had too much. Instead of giving him a shot, buy yourself one and enjoy buzz.

The World's Best Cosmo:
In a cocktail shaker, combine with ice:
2 oz vodka
1 oz Rose's lime juice
1 oz triple sec

anywhere from a splash to 2 oz cranberry juice, depending on your preference
Mix well and pour into a glass. Add a slice of lime for garnish and enjoy!